Comments (73)

Hey boys ;-) - 15 Jul, 2024 - 04:34PM

I know exactly how you feel. It would be nice just to have an honest discussion afterwards with someone. I would much rather be told they didn't realise how chubby I was (if that's the case) and wernt feeling it than sat wondering WTF because they ghosted.

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1686467 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 04:27PM

Although relatively new here compared to some the approach I have always intended to take, so as to mitigate the risk of these situations occurring, is to first send my connections an intro video of myself at the IM stage.

Firstly, this tells them you're confident. One lady I did this too the other day was taken aback by it (in a really good way) as she'd never had anything sent to her like it in all the time she'd been on IE..

Secondly, videos and voice messages can be a big ice breaker and provides both parties with a good idea if a meet will actually go the way its intended and with the desired results.

Lastly.. its also an opportunity for one of the parties to do a quick runner before a lot of time is wasted engaging in days / weeks worth of conversations. ha ha

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Funguy77 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 04:19PM

See I thought I was going about it wrong by having slightly lengthy chat at first. I really do prefer a face to face coffee as I quite enjoy the awkwardnessssss lol it that just me

Wold love to meet someone right now

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EmnEm123 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 02:38PM

But he has had second dates, hence the question is he holding something back until then?

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FluffyClouds - 15 Jul, 2024 - 02:27PM

Meeting face to face is the deciding factor for a lot of people. Whilst messaging gets you so far, building a rapport and hopefully that then leading to a date (coffee etc), it can also be the make or break. It's a personal thing, some just aren't what you were expecting or there was no chemistry. Though, I think your ladies should have given you the reason for not wanting date number 2 rather than just disappearing.

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MagicMouse321 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 02:24PM

With five dates in a few months, all of which have ghosted you? My suggestion might be a bit odd to others reading but I would get to know your next date a little more before you meet them as you might find that you might naturally screen them out before you meet.

Text, leave voice notes, exchange pictures, double check that they want to meet, perhaps even highlight your insecurities.

Above all be truthful. Else guess what? they'll ghost you purely because it's to much like hard work to sit you down and explain what they have since found unattractive about you.

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1685539 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 02:20PM

Can you pass them on to me please and I will ask them for you on our dates!

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Purple dreamer - 15 Jul, 2024 - 01:47PM

Wow 4 meets you must be doing something right , and they must like something to get that far
Why the ghost is beyond me they should just say if they do not feel the connection

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1685008 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 01:05PM

4 meets in a few months sounds great to be honest.
Were you ghosted straight afterwards or a few messages then nothing? Like the others have said it maybe they had others lined up too and clicked better.
The only thing you can do is be yourself

EmnEm123 - 15 Jul, 2024 - 12:19PM

Yes, I would be asking the same question as Beckysharp. Is there something that you're divulging on a second date that's somehow off putting?

If the answer is yes it would probably be best to include it in your profile. If someone doesn't like it at least you've been up front and honest.

But four meets in a few months? You must be doing something right!

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