The Difference is Me

About Me:

Bonjour Messieurs! No, I'm not French, but just sitting here in my garden with the Crystal Palace Transmitting Tower in the far distance. I know how to kill romance don't I?! It's reminiscent of the Eiffel Tower. Ok, so I've had a few vinos!!

WARNING

I have an irreverent SOH and a self deprecating one at that. Anyone who can't handle the former and thinks that the latter is a form of low self esteem then please do jog on and go back to that restrictive 'prison' mindset. All said very nicely and no offence meant.

Talking of cells. Thanks to the man who sent me my very first message. His idea was to hang me upside down in a 'dungeon'. I said a polite no thank you. It's bad enough being the right way up. Upside down? God knows where my body parts may have ended up!

Anyway, back to French fantasies. If yours is the thought of me running around in a French maid's outfit sporting a feather duster then sadly you would be headed for a disappointment. You'd more likely find me in my pj's, wearing Marigolds ( I recognise that could be a fantasy) with a J cloth in my hand. Yes, I meant J cloth and not G cloth or did I mean G string.

I won't turn up on a first date with a neat little Louis Vuitton handbag, just a trunk full of baggage. If we eat out I won't be Tarte Tatin. I'd probably go for Coq au Vin, but nowadays more vin than coq please.

I won't put up with any old crépe, Suzette or otherwise. But if you are a cross dresser and like to call yourself Suzette you would be considered.

Ideal Partner:

So, are you the Croque Monsieur to my Croque Madame? Yes, I do come with 2 eggs but they're neither fried or hard boiled. But scrambled really.

What am I looking for? Anyone really, just anyone.....

UPDATE

The majority of men who have messaged me can see the humour in the profile and especially my last sentence. However, a recent message has suggested that they have taken me very seriously (after I sent a very polite no thank you) and retorted with 'well, you were looking for anyone'. Not so.....

Other Interests:

Nature, Museums / Galleries, Music - Classical / Opera, Music - Blues/Jazz, Music - Rock, Hiking / Camping, Literature / History, Athletics, Theatre / Ballet, Travel / Sightseeing, Cooking, Food and Wine

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