Comments (208)

FinalGambit - 19 Dec, 2023 - 09:57AM

I'm very new here, but I would imagine that not everyone here is a hardened player. Some will have arrived reluctantly because of ongoing relationship problems that may have already dented their self confidence. If things have progressed as far as sharing images and at that point its clear there's not going to be chemistry then I think it's just common decency to say this in a non-judgmental way. Otherwise you're allowing them to think the worste, especially if you've already engaged. Just saying nothing after that seems unnecessarily brutal. Plus an individuals picture is seldom.a good reflection of what they will bring to any form of relationship. It is this level of naivity on my part which is preventing me from fully committing to this adventure.

 1 member likes this comment.

Red Succubus - 28 Oct, 2022 - 08:25AM

JLo
I’m sorry but I won’t reply to everyone who messages, in particular those where it is apparent they have not read my profile. Why should I waste my time sending a message, when we are clearly not suited or I am one of many in a scattergun message approach.

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1433169 - 27 Oct, 2022 - 11:35PM

If someone has taken the time to message you I think it's a good idea to reply. If you're not attracted to them physically, which if we are being honest is important, just say You seem lovely but not for me, good luck with IE..or something like that... However I'm afraid I have taken to using the block user option as some people don't remember you have politely declined them and come back for a 2nd/3rd go

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1479729 - 11 Oct, 2021 - 12:30PM

In truth, no one should be on any online dating site if they fear rejection. Why would anyone seriously expect to appeal to everyone's taste? Delusional.
"Sorry! Just not feeling it" should be adequate to anyone.
One bug though, I have visible pics or share immediately if strating to chat to someone. Anyone who carries on several chat messages without being prepared to reveal what they look like is hiding more than out of discretion or they have poor confidence in themselves. Getting into deep messaging without sharing only makes rejection more awkward.

 1 member likes this comment.

1441406 - 11 Oct, 2021 - 12:13PM

I know it's tricky but explaining that it's not right for you is so much better than a ghost.

We all know why we're on here and none of us imagine we're attractive to everyone ( well hopefully not anyway ) so saying something if at all possible ( you're not for me is fine in my book to receive ) is much better.

I completely get why answering this as a man means I don't see some of the reactions women get from men when they try to let them down gently so this maybe a rose tinted view of the world from me

 1 member likes this comment.

Perfect moments - 11 Oct, 2021 - 12:06PM

Just do what most do on here. Give you all the spiel, get you to go on kik or whatever and then vanish. Seems to be the norm on here at the moment.
I have a saying....I rather get hurt by the truth than by alot of lies and bull.
Just be honest and say I am sorry but I don't think we would be suited and wish them good luck in their search.

 1 member likes this comment.

hazle-eyes - 11 Oct, 2021 - 11:30AM

I think a polite thankyou for your interest but I have struck up a relationship with someone else on this site which I want to follow through on. Your not my type is such a generic term and I have had that. I had an affair with someone who I wouldn’t normally date but boy were they a surprise and opened my eyes. I think manners cost nothing but say a lot about you as a person.

1400607 - 13 Jun, 2021 - 10:47PM

Honestly this is a bug bear for me. I think of myself as reasonably attractive, but get ghosted by so many women on here.

Let's be honest ghosting is easier but just plain rude.

Sending a polite "thanks but no thanks" is the way forward. Simply not replying or blocking them is not on.

Let's all treat others how we want to be treated ; simple really x

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1450235 - 30 Apr, 2021 - 11:57PM

I do look for pics first and soon because it doesnt prolong chats etc. Im honest but kind....some people just are not others types. I do think men become pickier than women though. I consider myself reasonably attractive and have been ghosted here by men I wasnt overly attracted to but said hey you arent bad.

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1436839 - 20 Apr, 2021 - 10:35PM

I would definitely give a polite reply if he’s been prepared to share his profile with you. We all realise that everyone has their own type.

For me ghosting is rude and impolite.

 4 members like this comment.